The following post is from a previous trial of Basically, Britain. It was originally posted something like 3 years ago (at least WordPress says the last time it was modified was 3 years ago- the official date was 3/20/15). It was (and is) one of the best blog posts I have ever made. I will add on to it at the end with some additions that are more current than 3 years ago.
“I am not the same person I was last year.
I am not the same person I was 2 years ago.
I am not the same person I was 3 years ago.
I am not the same person I was 4 years ago.
Last year, I spent much for February and March trying to go back to the person I was 3 years ago.
2 years go I wanted to be the person I was 3 years ago.
3 years ago I was content.
4 Years ago, I wanted to be the person I was 3 years ago.
Today? I was thinking that I would like to be the person I was 4 years ago. That person was a genuinely good person. That person had her priorities. That person was happy, she just thought she would be happier if she would become the person she was 3 years ago. Yes, 3 years ago, I was happy; but I was not as good of a person. Sometime in between years 3 and 4, I really lost my connection with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I turned my own whole world upside down and I was totally ignorant to having done it. In that way, Ignorance truly was bliss. Some of my happiest times were during that ignorant bliss.
Yet, I do not want to go back to that happiness. I do not want to go back to striving to be the person I was 3 years ago. In fact, I do not want to go back to striving to be any person other than the one God wants me to be. I want to strive to be the person who wants what God wants for me. Don’t you dare say that that is an easy thing to strive for. (“But you grew up in a Christian home” “You go to church” “If you just read your bible enough” blah blah blah) Striving to be that person is like having a chocolate bar right in front of you, and trying not to eat it. That chocolate bar is not good for you in the long run, but it is sooooooo delicious in the present.
Even though I say I was a good, on track, person 4 years ago, I do not want to go backwards. I sit here and think about how all of the events from the past few years have shaped me. I’m not proud of everything I did, but I am proud of the way I am coming out of it all. So much of getting through the past, is letting it go- LEARNING FROM IT- but letting it go. [Insert Frozen lyrics here]
I’m just like every single person ever. Trying to achieve whole-hearted happiness. I know that the place where my happiness should be is God-shaped. I know he can fill it. I know he is filling it. I know I am striving for him to fill it more and more each day. At the same time though, Sometimes it just takes a little reminder as to what happiness does feel like. It takes a little reminder that, even though I am certainly not a lucky person, I am blessed beyond my wildest expectations.
I can say that happiness is finding out you made color guard for your high school band.
I can say happiness is illustrating music with a flag in your hand.
I can say happiness feels like the first time I marched at OTown, my freshman year in high school, in 2009.
I can say that happiness is putting on that homecoming dress for your very first high school dance.
I can say that happiness is getting a balloon turtle named Ferdinand at a fireworks show for Independence day.
I can say that happiness feels a kiss upside down on a ride at 6flags.
I can say that happiness is interpreting your first message in tongues at the winter retreat.
I can say that happiness is climbing a tree at the park with your best friend.
I can say that happiness is that free feeling when you first get your drivers license.
I can say that happiness is laughing with someone, and stopping mid laugh, just to admire how beautiful it is to watch a person laugh for a mere second.
I can say that happiness is finding out that you made your university’s color guard.
I can say that happiness is making the decision to go to USM over Bama.
I can say that happiness is performing with The Pride, making all of the hard work totally worth it.
I can say that happiness is, laying in the middle of campus on Centennial Lawn in like 30 degree weather, in footie pajamas, and looking up at the stars.
I can say that happiness is a kiss for the first time under that wonderful box.
I can say that happiness is seeing Rascal Flatts in concert with your daddy and best friend/sister.
I can say that happiness is riding a pool noodle, with three best friends on it, all the way across the lake a newtown and shrieking every time a fish bites your toe.
I can say that happiness is having the perfect little.
I can say that happiness is performing in Bryant Denny stadium and being better than their band, especially having chosen not to go to school there.
I can say that happiness is finishing a new painting.
I can say that happiness is Marching (and winning) in the Dublin, Ireland St. Paddy’s Day Parade.
I can say that happiness is landing in your own bed after traveling for a solid 24 hours on planes and buses.
I can say that happiness is your favorite food and soda after not being able to have it for a while because you were out of the country.
I can say there is always happiness in counting your blessings.
(and there is ALWAYS happiness in climbing trees.)
I didn’t just have a random spiritual turn around today by any means, its been a work in progress for the last coming up on two years. Its a work in progress. I am a work in progress.
In a sense, it may seem like my happiness is simple. It may seem as if I can be made happy a little too easily. I mean, I find pretty much instant happiness in grilled cheese, Dr. Pepper, footie pajamas, fuzzy socks, watching Cars, playing my music way too loud, giving an extravagant concert to my shower head, and climbing trees. The little things are just extremely important to me. I believe that finding happiness in a bunch of little things adds up. There is so much bad each day, be it spilling coffee on your white shirt, tripping, forgetting your umbrella the day it rains, etc. Being simple, easily swayed, makes these things so much better. Its as if walking a few minutes grumpily in the rain, was not even a big deal once I got in my car and turned the music up all the way. Its as if getting a flag in my hand makes it easier to forgive my friend after fighting with them. It’s little things. Little things just add up. Each little blessing is still from God. Each one is no more or less important than the other, and though small, each blessing is a building block into the person God is building you to be. Though small, these things are still totally worthy of being acknowledged as blessings, as important, as sent from the Lord. Many a times, its the little blessings that turn a whole day or week around for the better.
Sometime’s all people need is a Snickers.”
Happiness is working for the Mouse at Walt Disney World and meeting one of your very best friends of all time there.
Happiness is coming home from 5 months at Disney to your family and friends that you missed so.
Happiness is seeing your Little again on a visit to Mississippi after over a year of not seeing her.
Happiness is getting your first Full-Time job in a field you are passionate about.
Happiness is FINALLY getting a color guard instructor position after years of trying.
Happiness is getting to do freelance choreography for a guard and having your services out there.
Happiness is Whataburger.
Happiness is seeing your boyfriend after months of not seeing him.
Happiness is having real friends dispersed in a world where everyone is so fake.
Happiness is being out on your own, and not sucking at it too much because your parents are awesome and prepared you well.
Happiness is a new baby puppy.
Happiness is knowing you are in a really good place right now, even during the hard times, you are in a good place.
I can’t wait to continue to add types of happiness into my life.
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